There are so many things that can happen to us in this life, some great and some not-so-great, and at some point we all come to the realization that we can't control any of it. You can't control what happens to you, only how you react to it. Perhaps you will lose your job tomorrow, get into a car accident, find out a loved one is sick, suffer a financial setback, or simply have a "bad" day. Did you ever think, though, that perhaps it happened for a very good reason? Looking back, aren't there times in your life when something bad happened and at the time you simply couldn't possibly see anything good coming from it, any light at the end of the tunnel, or any truth in empathetic words such as "Everything happens for a reason"? I know I've had times like that, many of them. And do you want to know what? I have learned something invaluable from all of them, become a stronger and better person for all of them, and gotten to a sunnier, happier place in the end.
So why do we have such a hard time trusting, at that time that something "bad" is happening to us, that it's leading us to something better? Why can't we trust in the lesson, in the process, in our process. Everything in this life truly does happen for a reason. Perhaps you're running late to a meeting and because of being late, you avoid what would've been a terrible car accident. Maybe someone breaks up with you and breaks your heart, and a few months later you meet the person you are truly meant to be with, someone who makes you so much happier. Or maybe, like best-selling author Tama Kieves, you decide to opt out of an important meeting with some editors one day because your inner voice is nagging you to take a walk in the park. (Random, right?) And all because you chose to listen to it, you meet and strike up a conversation with a woman in the park who just happens to be a big-time editor at the magazine you've been dying to write for and she wants to meet with you soon to discuss future job possibilities! The best things in life often come after some of the worst, kind of like the rainbow that follows a rainstorm. Trust. Trust that no matter what you're going through or what terrible thing just happened, that it happened for a very good reason. Trust that it will bring the best of you to the surface and that it will ultimately lead you to a better place. You can't see it now and you won't be able to connect the dots until later, but trust that at some point in the future, they will connect. In a few weeks or maybe even in a few years, you will be able to look back and say, "Wow, if I never would've lost my job unexpectedly, I never would've gotten this one!" Or, "If I never would've lost my mom, I never would've started a support group to help grieving young adults and I never would've realized how good I am at listening to people talk about their grief and helping them work through it." I can't tell you when the storm will pass or where you will find yourself when it does, but I can tell you that the best thing to do is trust that everything is happening exactly as it's supposed to and that your life and your process is unfolding exactly how it is meant to. Expect the best and trust.
I know how hard it is to get through tough things like a cancer diagnosis, job loss, personal failure, and a breakup, but remember that what doesn't kill you will only make you stronger. Feel what you're feeling and honor those feelings, but don't allow them to take over. As my mom always said, "When things go bad, don't go with them." Trust me, I know how hard it is to do that, but trust in yourself and believe that you can hang in there, be positive, and wait patiently for the rainbow. Why? Because you can.
P.S. Don't forget to not stare at the door that has closed for too long, because if you do, you might miss the new one that is opening....
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